Mornings are hard.

So, it's been a while. I guess. I just haven't felt like writing stuff. Especially when I have to write stuff for school. Though no academic articles or anything, so it's not that bad. Maybe a bit.

Anyhoo, I have to write a paper for my UCF (Understanding the Christian Faith) class, and we can talk about some big issue. So pretty much anything. And I'm kind of leaning towards how we should love, or just love in general. I think it's an important issue, that we skim over, because it seems like it should be obvious or easy. And it's not. It's just not. So I just thought I'd organize my thoughts out a bit before truly starting out. Maybe see if anyone has any thoughts about it.

Which I actually asked my professor after class if he thought it was a good topic. And he said it could use to be narrowed a bit, made more specific, but over all it's a good topic. That makes me pretty happy. I have a topic!!

In other news, I have bright red hair again. I just redyed it, it's all lovely and bright, and oh my Celestia, I feel like the little mermaid. There's something about bright colors that is just wonderful, you know? They brighten up my day. All day, I've been walking up to doors and staring at the bright red reflection in the glass. Also, I'm happy my school has doors made of glass. 

To add to all this happiness, I found my last good hair tie! It's the only one that's not overly stretched out, or broke so the elastic peeks out and pulls at my hair. In the words of Luna:

A not so lovely thing that happened today (besides making myself get out of bed) is that a fellow student in my philosophy class got pissed and stormed out. And on his way he called both the class, and the teacher fucking retarded. And then he threw in that philosophy is gay. And tossed over a lectern. Everyone sat there in silence for a bit after that, just shocked. That sort of behavior is not okay. I don't care if you don't like the class, or the teacher. You paid for that class, you chose to sign up for it, so either sit there and keep your mouth shut, or drop the class. It's not that hard. If you really don't like philosophy, just stop coming! Or even just show up and not pay attention. Put earbuds in, or zone out, or whatever. And using words like retarded and gay? Not cool bro. Seriously. Not cool.

I personally like the class, and the teacher. He's a super cool guy, he was my alpha group leader when I first got to college, and I'd looked forward to taking this class, pretty much all because of him. And philosophy isn't that bad. I mean, it's not something I get easily, but then I don't get every single subject right on the nose all the time. That's why I'm a student who goes to class to learn from a professor. A professor who has the credentials to work at a college. I can't be certain, but I'm pretty sure they don't let just anyone in.

And now back to using words like retarded, and gay. You're using them to call something worthless, and stupid. That is not okay either! Honestly. You wouldn't like it if someone said "That is so rude student who just barges out of the room!" Especially if they meant it in context to you. You'd feel horrible! Like, why have I done something wrong?

So, yah. Good times.

Pick up line time! The main thing every one has missed in the couple weeks I haven't posted anything. I don't feel like doing a ton of searching, so here's my personal favorite. Cheers!

I lost my teddy bear. Can I sleep with you?

I think he has a bunch of excellent points. Kay. Carry on.

 

You know, sometimes I watch stuff, and I just want to share it. Because I feel like it expresses what I feel and they say it so much better. Yah.

So. Tiny little rant time. The digital media arts department of my school has declared that all DMA students need to buy themselves their own tablet. Not an iPad tablet, in case you're wondering, a drawing tablet. Which, if I hadn't just bought a Macbook, I would be all, fuck yeah! I'm getting a tablet. Time for arts. But, I did just buy a Macbook. I know why the department did it, the ones they use to provide for us kept getting taken, and they were kind of jank. Some of the pens were missing buttons, some of the screens were a tad glitchy. So we'll get better quality and save the department budget a bit, which can lead to cooler, better stuff elsewear, but I just bought a Mac! My bank account is super low. I still have a couple other text books I need to buy. I'm super poor. College is expensive, man.

Now, I have a feeling I'll end up loving my tablet. I'm looking at the Wacom Bamboo Create, which seems pretty reasonably priced and a pretty good quality tablet. And it means I can do even more homework off campus, which my mom will love, since I commute. And I would need it eventually for doing free lance stuff, or working from home, or doing commissions, stuff like that.

If any one wants to see my arts (which are mostly traditional art), here's a link to my DeviantArt page: Click me. If you want.

Pick up line time!!

THIS :or: I'll stick with hamburgers for now

How many of you are tired of the Chik-fil-a thing? Me too. Though, I also want to say, I'm so tired of the way it's been handled. Up till now I hadn't really even wanted to talk about it. So many of my friends on Facebook posted about the appreciation day it and were all whoo Christian values! If more of them cussed, they prolly would have been all fuck yeah! And I'm so ready for it all to end.

Honestly, I didn't even really know exactly how I felt about it. I hadn't done alot of research, and all my "sources" were pro Chik-fil-a, so I couldn't even be sure I was getting both sides of the story. But then I read THIS. I think I know which side I'm on now. And it's not Chik-fil-a's side.

Now, if anyone who actually knows me is reading this, you may be going, "What? I thought you were a Christian!" Yah, well, I thought so too. But the whole goal of christians is to be like Christ. NOT to spend money on expensive though delicious chicken to prove a point. What point were you trying to prove anyways? Look at me, I'm standing in line to eat something because I believe that being gay is wrong! Look at me take a picture with my iPhone! Look at me as I drive homosexual people farther away from feeling welcome around Christians!

Now, Chik-fil-a, I'm not upset about you thinking marriage is about one man and one woman. Lots straight people think that too (though some don't yell it from the rooftops.) I'm not mad about you saying you support free speech, though honestly. This is America. And Americans fucking love free speech. And a day to appreciate delicious food? Who doesn't love delicious food? But this whole damn mess is so political, so line dividing, so isolating. I do not want to have to pick between being anti Chik-fil-a or anti gay. I mean, it shouldn't even make sense! What sense does it make to have to be either against gay people, who are PEOPLE WITH FEELINGS, or against a corporation, that mostly just wants your money and business.

Honestly. And to those who have gone to Chik-fil-a, and proudly declared it, I'm a bit disappointed in you. First off, you are excluding a group of people who you claim are sinners. That will certainly make those "sinners" want to come hear about Jesus! Next, I just want to share some scripture, you know, from the Bible: "When you do something for someone else, don't call attention to yourself. You've seen them in action, I'm sure—'playactors' I call them— treating prayer meeting and street corner alike as a stage, acting compassionate as long as someone is watching, playing to the crowds. They get applause, true, but that's all they get. When you help someone out, don't think about how it looks. Just do it—quietly and unobtrusively. That is the way your God, who conceived you in love, working behind the scenes, helps you out. So. That's Matthew 6:2-4, message version, in case you were wondering. And I feel like it is super applicable.


I prolly won't eat Chik-fil-a anytime soon. We're called to LOVE. Not eat chicken. Not point out what we see as other people's sins. And if we do end up doing these things, we aren't supposed to have giant signs saying "Look at me!! Look what I support!" Though if I do eat at Chik-fil-a, I want y'all to know it's to eat chicken. Not to make a point, or say that I'm for or against anything. It's to eat food. Just to fucking eat food.


I feel disappointed. It's not the first time, won't be the last. I just want everyone to be happy and like each other and get along. But maybe that's just not possible. And I'm pretty sure it's not the homosexual community who's standing in the way.

Here's a beautiful quote by the beautiful Darren Criss:

 
                                  Bravo, Darren! Bravo! Why are you so wonderful?




And finally, I found a pick up line that I thought was ironic. Cause irony can be fun.

Blessed and Clumsy :or: I have the best friends anyone could ask for

This week has been awesome. I've gotten to see some wonderful people that I haven't in super long, AND... I'm getting a Macbook soon. I've also felt so fucking clumsy. Like, I got stains on a BRAND NEW SKIRT twice the first time I wore it. TWICE. I was at this frozen yogurt place for my sister's birthday (she's getting old. Halfway to 50), and I went to add some whipped cream, cause you know, why not? And it spluttered. I've dropped stuff. I got some blood drawn for blood work/tests and almost passed out. (Though, really, who needs FOUR FUCKING VIALS OF BLOOD anyways? There's got to be a better way than to draw out my blood.) 

So. I've felt like my week has been awesome. I got to see my Amanda, and Danni, and Danielle, and Kelsey, and on Friday I'm going to see another friend! And we shall sit and drink coffee and chat, and I shall try not to Instagram my Starbucks... I only recently got a phone that can use Instagram. I like it. Lots. But on the other hand, it's like I need to be clumsy to almost counter balance it. Maybe I can't just go from having no social life to seeing bunches of people without having a bunch of super awkwardness somewhere in my life. I'm super happy I finally have something to talk about though!

I would like to add, about the blood drawing... It was supposed to be a non fasting blood work, but since I hadn't eaten since before 7:30 that morning, and my mom wanted to get it done before we went to Subway, it turned into fasting. Which may have been a large part of the reason I almost fainted. (But I didn't! I didn't black out! ....I was close. But I didn't!) Plus, four vials. FOUR VIALS. My blood is supposed to stay in my body, thank you very much. Gah. I hate having blood drawn or getting injections/vaccinations. And people wonder why I don't give blood.

And now the part you've all been waiting for.... PICK UP LINE TIME

Loving. ::or:: Treating others fairly

So, you may or may not know this, but it's election year. Yaaayyy Murrica. Three cheers for the red white and blue England. One thing that has come up ALOT amongst the people I know who are on Face book, is their hatred of our current President, Barack Obama. Now, it's totally fine to not like some one. That's cool. You don't have to like everyone. Try to love them anyways, yes, but you don't have to like them. But these people, especially the conservative ones, take the piss out of him all they can. And that pisses me off. This man is our leader. He's responsible for all of us. Our well being. they make rolls of toilet paper with his face on every square, talk about how they're going to get a watermelon with his face drawn on it and the smash it with a sledge hammer, and then complain about how he's screwed us over? Obama may be so busy fucking running our country to see the things about him on the internet, and I doubt he Facebook stalks all the Americans everywhere, but if the stuff the Obama despisers say about him were said about me, I'd want to screw them over too. Not only that, but what if his daughters or his wife are on the internet and see that? This is the man they love, this is their father, their husband. This isn't just about you not liking someone then. This is about you hurting someone who is loved by his family.

I'm cool with being American. Don't worry, I know that I'm blessed. But people say stuff like, "This man's ruining our country!" And I'm just kind of over here like, "Whelp. Time to move to Switzerland." I don't want to be part of a country where we blame one man for screwing the rest of us over. Guess what? It takes two to tango. (I don't know if that's an applicable colloquialism but it has alliteration, so I'm sticking with it.) Now, I'm not the most political savvy person out there. But there is a reason he is our president. It is called voting. Which means, he had to have the majority votes. So those people had a hand in ruining our country too. He's also not alone in his leadership. There's the Cabinet, the House of Representatives, the Senate. I'm sure at times our dear president has just said yes or know to something that really these people are behind, or he was outvoted or something. So add them to the "ruined America" list. There's foreign policy, getting oil from out of the country, so many factors. And then there's the rest of Americans. You may resent Obama for not being the best president, but have you ever stopped to think, "maybe I could do more?" Everything I see is about waiting for Obama to get kicked out of office. Surely there could have been more they could have done. Participated in a rally. Signed a petition. Try emailing the people who represent us.

This has turned into a rant, but
what I really wanted to talk about is loving. If I can be known as one thing, I want to be known as someone who loves. I mean, I'm not always good at it. I fail repeatedly. Oh my celestia, do I fail. But I try. And it hurts when I see people taking the piss out of people. It's not okay. Words have an effect, and a picture is worth a thousand words, so do you really need that picture up that puts down that person? We're so hard on them. And prolly about 90% we're putting down people we don't even know. It's not okay. My mom was looking at some picture of Selena Gomez the other day, I think it came up on her Facebook. And she started saying stuff like, "Is she no longer a good roll model? It's so sad... I liked her?" I think I snapped a bit, and said something like, "You really have no right to be disappointed in someone you don't even know." Selena Gomez is one of my celebrity crushes. I adore her. She kind of gave me a dirty look, but honestly, we don't have a right. These people are still people. The moment you make them 'a good role model', it's almost like you take away their freedom to make mistakes. They're just people like you or me, but it's kind of like we put them on a pedestal, and then are super disappointed when they get off this pedestal that they never put themselves on in the first place. 

And even on a local setting with the people we know, we could be more loving. This is the part where I fail the most. If there's someone I don't like, or feel uncomfortable around, or even just don't know what to do around them, I kind of block them out. I don't really respond to them if I can help it. And I hate myself for it. It's not right, and I feel horrible about it after, but when I'm in the moment, all I can think is "Don't come near me. Don't talk to me. Don't touch me." And I want to get better, I really do. I want to be a person who loves. I'm trying my best. If we all just loved each other, the world would be so much better. It's hard to want to screw over someone you love. Cause when you really love someone, you put them ahead of you. I mean, you still look out for yourself, you shouldn't just be a push over. But if there's something bothering them, you should focus on them, not yourself. If they want to do something you aren't a fan of or disapprove of, you shouldn't give them the ten reasons why it's not a good idea. Odds are, if they really want to do it they've already researched it, looked it all up, have pros and cons lists. Things we want and the things we love have a way of becoming a part of us. If you're taking the mickey out of someone who personal example wants a tattoo, or you're telling them why it's a horrible idea, or even if you just quietly disapprove of it, that person can feel like you're telling them they're stupid. That you disapprove of them as a person.

We're defensive about the things we love. They have a way of sneaking into our hearts and making their home there. And that's the way it should be, not forced. Like John Green says in The Fault in Our Stars: "I fell in love the way you fall asleep. Slowly, and then all at once." It shouldn't be obvious till you already love it. It's like eating a new food, you may like how it looks, how it's presented, how it smells, but you can't truly say you love that food till you've tried a couple bites. And even then you only know if you like it or not.

Now that I feel like I've wrapped that up fairly nicely, I'd like to present some reasons why I'm a fan of Obama:
Firstly: He's a fan of the Avengers. Anyone who's a friend of the Avengers is a friend of mine

Secondly: He "released" his birth video, and then made sure to tell Fox News it was a joke.

Thirdly: This video, which was not done by Obama, as far as we know but is still so good.

Fourthly and finally: He's a human being. And he deserves love, just like the rest of us. 

I'd like to end this with a clip from Juno. Because that movie makes me super happy, and I haven't watched it in a while.
Unfortunately, while I'd like to, it's not letting me, so here's the link if you are so inclined: HERE


Well, since I wasn't able to end with Juno, PICK UP LINE TIME

 Oliver Wood would be my crush if I were at Hogwarts. <3

Double Standards :or: Mmmm Smexy bodies

A friend of mine posted a link to this blog/post thingy. And it intrigued me, not only because I've had a tiny little secret desire to see Magic Mike, but also because I've noticed the double standards elsewhere. For those of you who didn't click the link and have no idea what I'm talking about, the post is about female's reactions to the movie, Magic Mike, which is about some male strippers. Honestly, I don't even know if it has a plot. But with Channing Tatum's abs, is a plot really necessary?

My last sentence may or may not have been meant ironically (but seriously, he has GREAT ABS) Now, this kind of sentence came from the type of person with balls, he might get a reprimand. If he were to comment on a movie about female strippers, and the actors being fit, it might come off a bit sexist or pervy. You know? Which I think is unfair. Now, I really have no clue what makes a girl "hot" or "fit" in the eyes of a guy. I really don't. Though I imagine it differs from male to male. I mean, one guy might see big tits, and think, "Oh wow, hello there." Others might not care about that at all, and instead be an ass man. Or they might be attracted to a fine pair of eyes in a pretty face. I honestly have no idea. I mean, my celebrity crushes are different than my friends celebrity crushes, which must mean we are attracted to different things. For instance, my main celebrity crush is Darren Criss. Especially when his hair's all loose and curly and he has a beard. Mmmm. Just mmm. So lovely. He's also got a very nice body. Well. At least torso/arms/legs. And ass. And face. But I digress. 

It seems unfair that men "get in trouble" (so to say) for this kind of behavior, while women don't. Men can't look at women's bodies and appreciate them, but women get a free pass....? Women can be just as vulgar/perverted/dirty minded as men. There are women who masturbate (at least if the awesome webcomic Girls with Slingshots is true to life) Women who think about sex all the time. Women who don't see men as men so much as a thing with a cock that would feel so good inside them. So why this double standard?

Recently, something of this vein has been bothering me. You know of pintrest, I presume? I do believe I might have mentioned it before (and my super awesome board of potential tattoos) Now, here's the thing that irks me. Lots of people are motivated to loose wait/get healthy, and post motivational things. Not a big deal. In fact, I'm for that. If you want to get healthy, and mayhaps drop a couple pounds, go for it. All for it. You go guurrrrlll. But one of the things that is often posted are pictures of barely clothed women. I had brought this up with my mom, and she was all like, "It's just motivation!" No. No, no no, no. You see, alot of the pictures I've seen are pictures we'd give guys loads of crap for if it was on their pintrest. (Do guys have pintrests? Point still stands) Look at these pictures. Looks at them. These are in the fitness section.

What person stands with their ass perfectly arched out like that? Honestly now. It makes for a very nice line, but honestly. And then there's the girl in the bikini. Yes, she has a nice body. But can you honestly say that if some guy you know had this picture on his facebook wall, you'd feel perfectly fine with it?

As a girl who has been raised in church since she was born, I've gotten modesty talks over and over again. We need to keep our tits hidden, we need to not dress slutty, we need to help our brothers out but not dressing provocatively. You know why? Because they're male, they have dicks, and they think with them. Well, it wasn't said like that, but you get the drift. (I just unintentionally made me laugh. Mid drifts are another thing to be kept under wraps. And by wraps, I mean clothes.) So. Most the people I know on pintrest are people who've either sat with me through such talks, or believe in mostly acting that way anyways. So why the fuck would they think it's okay to post stuff like this? I don't get it.

I'd rather it be all or nothing. I'd rather we all accept that sometimes we're attracted to people sexually, and sometimes we talk about a person as more as a really nice looking thing than as a person, or that we'd all just stop. Which would be super hard, not only for guys, but also for those who are going to be artists and doctors. You know? I believe the body is beautiful. (Maybe not cocks so much. Those are kind of icky looking, not going to lie.)  But it is beautiful, and it should be admired. Think upon great works of art. Like Michelangelo's David. I don't know if you know this, but that statue is completely in the buff. Nothing to hide. I think the big difference, between such a work of art and the photo's from pintrest, is how he's portrayed. He's not booty poppin'. He's not carved so his abs are the first thing you noticed. He's not giving off a smoldering look. He's there as a statue, not a carving of something overly sexual.


This is all my opinion. I could be sprouting complete and utter bullshit, for all I know. I just hate it when people talk about males as lecherous things who twirl their mustaches well fapping to pictures of almost nekked ladies. Women do it too. Maybe we don't fap to it. But we gush. We draw fanart. We drool. We go on and on about it. We kid about our ovaries exploding. We talk about wanting this or that person's babies. In a way, we kind of emotionally fap to them. Which could be just as bad.

After all that heavy talk about double standards, should I add a pick up line?
......Yes. But don't worry, I chose a super appropriate one. (Kind of. Just.... It's ironic, okay? Cause I'm just so hipster and all that shit.)

.....I'm such a lady. #sarcasm
So. If there's anyone out there who'd like to weigh in, tell me I'm wrong, agree with me, tell me I have nice tits, knock yourself out. As long as you aren't saying stuff like "I hate you!! Go kill yourself!", I'd love to hear what you think.



P.S. I'm off to watch some of the super awesome Lizzie Bennet diaries!! I made myself wait till I had finished my blog. If you want to watch the latest episode that I'm about to run off and squee about, hear ya go:

Edit: recently a friend told me this post was really explicit. I personally feel like maybe they missed the point. It's not about sex, or sexy times, or wanting to have sex. It was meant to be kind of an, we all have these thoughts, urges, feelings, whatever. But why is it expected of guys to have these thoughts, were as if girls have such thoughts, we just all laugh together, or we hide them? It's a part of being a human. Except for asexual people.

A Goodly Day for a Blog

 

I was just sitting here, minding my business, when I thought to myself, today would be an excellent day for a blog! Yuppers. And today, boys and girls, I want to talk about words, actually certain words that are looked down upon. 

Last night, I was talking to my sister and mom. And I had mentioned that I feel better emotionally, (and feel like I'm less of a bitch) when I've spent some time with friends. I had seen Danielle and Danni on Friday, and Saturday, I felt less pissy in general. Maybe it's just me, but I really think it makes a difference. Or maybe I just miss everyone so much...

Anywho, we're talking and my mom says, "What, you can't talk to us? What are we, chopped liver?" Now, I do talk to my family. But I don't bare the deepest darkest corners of my soul to them. I also try not to cuss around them. (Though this one time I said something about some one trying to fuck up around my mom, and I don't think she even heard me.) I don't know about you or your life. I don't. But even though I often cuss, I try to restrain myself around those who think it to be vulgar. Which can be super hard. I personally feel that we should use the words that best fit the situation. And if the proper word is shit, then so be it. (Later on I said something about how something pissed me off, and my mom put her hands over her ears, and went, "lalalalala" as loud as she could)

 
 So. Somewhere around the beginning of this lovely blog, I have a post that talks about cussing, how I don't believe in not doing something just because people tell me it's wrong. If I am going to restrain from doing something (like cussing), I want it to be because I have a personal conviction that it's wrong. And I honestly don't think that cussing is wrong. My sister said something about, it's okay as long as you use it in the right context! Which is bullshit. I mean, unless we want to make sure every single word we use is in the right context. All or nothing.

Now the point of this blog is not to say that cussing is fucking amazing and we should all do it. No. In fact, that's not even the point I want to make. The point I want to make is that sometimes, those who are against saying shit, fuck, bitch, all those fun swear words, these people almost seem more concerned with someone who says shit, and the fact that the word was said, than more important things. 

One of my professors gave us an example of this. A speaker was talking at some christian assembly/meeting/convention. A prominent speaker. He opened up with a fact, that stated how many kids die each year with out ever getting the chance to know about God. And then he said 'shit'. Which he followed up with, "Most of you are now more horrified that I said shit, than all of those children."

The point, my darling readers, is cussing can be vulgar. It can be. But words and reactions can be even more vulgar. If I had been at this meeting, I wouldn't have even thought twice about him saying shit. I have my own shit I don't got together, I have no place to judge. But the fact that there are children dying. CHILDREN. DYING. Probably of diseases that could be prevented, depending on where they live or don't live. THAT breaks my heart. It breaks my heart so much more than any "naughty" word could ever do.

Honestly, I would rather have people cuss. Really. I think the people who care about such things have become so sensitized to it, that they almost consider it a giant sin. Something to be overcome. But I would rather have people say shit than have them lie, or slander. I would rather them say fuck than have them cheat in their relationship. I would rather them say bitch than have them cut down other people, or hate on other people. There are so many things wrong in our society. I don't think cussing is our biggest concern. You can be rude and vulgar without cussing, by your attitude or how you say your words.

After that fun, lighthearted post, have a pick up line/daily odd comment.
Cheers

Scaredy Cat or I really shouldn't be in Gryffindor

 I think, I could be wrong (I don't have alot of data to base it on) But I think I'm scared. Now, I have my fair share of doubts, fears, and anxieties. For instance, I have an irrational fear of mannequins. It's not as bad as it used to be when I was a little tyke, but they still really freak me out. And I get anxiety when it comes to speaking out in class, or even Sunday school classes. I can't do it, till it becomes almost a fear or, what if I open my mouth and something stupid comes out? Or I'll be thinking about my birthday for whatever reason, and I'll get terrified that I'll just blurt out that "It's muh birthday!" It scares me. And don't get me started on public speaking. Long story short, I shake. It's not pleasant.

Recently, I've been thinking about boyfriends and how nice it would be to have one. But at the same time, I'm scared. What if no one ever likes me? What if I love this person? Will that person love me the same way? It's very very scary. It's almost like gambling on not only your fucking emotions, but some one else's too. You have no idea how they feel about you, except what they tell you. And people have been known to lie every now and then.

I'm also terribly awkward. In cases where I've found out some one likes me, or someone asks me "Do you think that person likes you?", I've become.... less open and close with them? I guess? I just stop spending as much time with them, and often I'll even become a bit rude and sharp to them. And I hate myself for it. I want to be loving and kind and nice. And I try! I do try.

I think it's fear. I really really do. You know, I look forward to having kids (not the actual pushing them out of my vagina, but you know, the kids) I love kids. I do. Now, babies that spit and poop and drool I don't absolutely adore. But I get excited about having kids of my own. Whether adopted or the ones I carry myself. Because they will be mine, and something I can love unconditionally. They will be mine. I look forward to that. I can call them pet names, like darling, or sweetheart. And it won't be weird, cause they shall be mine to look after and protect, and love. 

With a significant other, you can't guarantee that they'll be yours and yours alone. There are other people in their lives. They have parents, siblings, friends, mentors. And that's the way it should be. But the uncertainty. It's annoying and difficult. Maybe I'll just be an old cat lady. That would take away the anxiety a bit. A bit like waving the white flag at the same time, though. Or, it's like not liking to order from fast food places, so you just don't go.

Now that I've bared some of my insecurities to the world......

here's a pick up line. Cause that's just how I roll.

I post stuff like this and wonder how I'm single

 

P.S. I'm on Pottermore (twice). The first time I was put in Ravenclaw, the second time I actually was put in Gryffindor. In case you were wondering about the title. I'm fairly sure I should be in Slytherin, though I want to be in Hufflepuff. I've spent long showers dwelling on such important questions as which house I'd be in. But I guess Pottermore knows best.

An Ethics Paper I did for School. And thought I would share.

• Identify the facts surrounding the issue
• Define the issues surrounding the issue
• Identify the people/groups of people that are affected
• Identify the options for each affected group
• Describe the consequences of these options
• How do your values and beliefs including your religious faith affect your view of the issue?
• If confronted with this type of ethical situation/issue, what would you do?

I chose to talk about the ethics surrounding blogs, as I have a blogger, a Tumblr, a DeviantArt and I had to do a blog for class (Intro to DMA) last semester. I feel like I have personal connections to such an issue.

Blogs are like journals or diaries, that the whole world can see. It’s kind of exciting, really. People can write about everything, whatever, nothing. There is no limit, really, as what a blog can be. It can be a picture blog, a blog about restaurants, a blog that reviews movies, a ranting blog. Whatever. And with the easiness of copy and paste, save image as, and downloading stuff off the internet, it’s super easy to take other people’s “intellectual property” and post it as your own.

Now, when I did the blog for school last semester, our professor, Leeper, told us we needed to have a picture or a video or something, as well as writing what we think. He wanted us to keep it to story-telling and DMA- related stuff, at least kinda keep it related, but really, we could talk about anything. But I got use to taking pictures from DeviantArt and webcomics. And I did try to cite, and put where I got the pictures, at least. Sometimes I felt bad when I didn’t. So I tried to remember to cite. And now that I have my own personal blog, I don’t have as many pictures, unless they’re my pictures, or it says somewhere that they are free to use. Just cause I don’t want to accidentally take someone else’s work and pass it off as my own, or use it when they didn’t want it used.

I’d say this mostly affects the artist. Those putting their work out there, trying to get noticed, or just sharing their work with the world. I mean, artists put their music up on MySpace to get notice, but they don’t want you just taking it and adding it to your collection. How are they supposed to make a living if their wares keep getting taken without charge?

At least on Tumblr, you have the option to reblog. It shows who you reblogged it from, who they reblogged it from, and eventually you get back to the first person. And so, you can share what makes you happy without accidentally claiming it as something you made, or something you came up with. Some people put water-marks on their artwork that’s hard to remove without destroying the picture.

People still try to steal stuff, claim it as their own. Remove the watermark, touch it up. Change it just the teensy-est bit. I see it one DeviantArt, people will have journals where they’ve found their pictures around the interwebs, and they don’t know who to petition, how to get it removed, or they just want to spread the word, so people know who the rightful owner is. One person even had one of their original characters, that they created, and so belonged to that person, on a porn role-playing site. Which is just wrong. It doesn’t matter if the drawing looks just like what whoever took it thought their character always looked like. It’s wrong. It’s like slandering, really.


The consequences of it are hard to describe, often these people don’t ever get noticed. I mean, it’s a huge world outside, and with a world wide web with many people having Facebooks, Tumblrs, DeviantArt, Bloggers, Wordpresses, YouTubes it can be easy to just bury it. Not only that, some people have more than one account on each of these. I know of people on Tumblr who have hipster blogs, Disney blogs, and their personal blog. Even if they do get caught, it’s not like they get thrown out of the internets for all of eternity. At most they get blocked from a site or two, and maybe some hate mail. And that’s at most. At least they’ll get away with it, and have people telling them how creative they are.

Sometimes it is easy to want to take other’s stuff and try to pass it off as your own. I mean, it’s there. Surely it can’t be too hard to just take it, and put it back up somewhere else. But as someone who has spent hours on art projects, and making sure everything is as close to how I saw it in my head, if someone did that to me, I’d be super pissed. If someone took something I had stressed about, spent days on, thought about it while trying to fall asleep, I would just be both mad, and at the same time sad and disappointed. I mean, it’s mine. I worked on it. And you’re just going to copy  it, and say you did all that work? And so from the perspective of someone who has put time and effort into their work, I just couldn’t do it. I just can’t even justify that. I know everyone wants to feel special, and talented, but stealing other people’s work is not the way to do it. It only shows you are talented at taking what’s not yours.

I don’t mind people using my artwork, if they credit it. I don’t really mind at all. But not everyone feels like that, especially those who do want their work to be theirs. They don’t want you to take their work, period. It’s not a gift. It’s not a free for all. It might seem a bit selfish to some, that people won’t share their art, and their work, but with something where you have to invest so much of yourself, it’s completely understandable. It’s your piece of work. Not anyone else’s. And if I ever realize I “stole” or “claimed” someone’s work, I’d feel horrible.

Blogs, and artwork, and music, and videos are something that people make for themselves, or are something they do for a living. Not for anyone else. It’s theirs.

Gaaahhhh the emotions! And such seriousness

So, I how all of y'all are doing well. Yes? If so, good! I'm happy. If not.... Well. Boo.

This past week has been super stressful. I've been tired and bitchy (mostly in my head, every now and then it came out), and people kept asking me if I was okay. Which I mostly just felt tired, and I would be like, "....Yeah?" Good week. Then last night I was at home and had a conversation with my parents about homosexuality, weather it's right or not. Now, you guys know my stance. I don't care if you are straight, gay, bi, or a dinosaur. I support people in general. If you're a person, I support you. That's just how it is. If I don't like you, it's either cause I actually know you, and I just don't feel comfortable about, you are my Sound for Film prof, or you've done something horrible, like genocide, and you are unrepentant. If you do something on that scale of ...bad-ness. And you don't even care about the pain you've caused? Go screw yourself. Just... go.

Anyways, I normally like talking to my mom about serious stuff. We both listen and talk, and even if we have different view points, I've never felt bad for having a different opinion. Maybe a bit guilty for not feeling the way she does sometimes, but never that I'm a horrible person. My dad on the other hand, is so.... un-wavering in his opinion, in his stance on matters, that he makes me feel like he thinks I'm an idiot. Now, when it's something I want that he makes me feel bad about, it's not that bad. It's just me. For instance, when ever I bring up wanting more piercings, he asks me why I would want more holes in my head. When I mention Starbucks, he asks why anyone in their right mind would want to drink coffee. And let's not mention his opinions on dogs and puppies. He is practically almost racist against dogs. (Can you be racists against dogs?) But to make me feel stupid and idiot like for supporting people? Yes, they are gay. Yes, they are living that life style. And I don't know, maybe "being gay" is a sin. Maybe. I don't know, and I'm not going to sit here and raise my hand and be all "Lord Jesus, cure them gays." That is not loving. I mean, these gay people go through their lives, often being bullied, struggling to accept themselves. And if it is possible for these people to "change" or "get better", then all people like my dad are doing is making it harder to get changed. Just by being the quietly disproving, unwelcoming people.

I don't care about your sexual preference. I don't. I'm a fan of yours no matter what. And maybe it is wrong, I don't know. But I know, people who are strongly opinionated on both sides yell at the other sides alot. And are mean. And spew out hateful words. And I just want everyone to be happy. It makes me sad. It makes my heart hurt a little. I can't stand for something that just wants to tear something else down, no matter what I believe.

These blogs all feel really serious. Maybe this will just be a blog where I get all my serious thoughts out. I don't know. I was going to find pictures, but I really gotta pee, so I'm just going to rap this up now.

Kay. Bye. I hope this makes someone smile.