Monday, April 23, 2012

Loving equally.

So last night I was at floor worship. And it was wonderful, and I loved it. One of the girls on the floor was talking about how she doesn't label herself as christian, because she can't understand how people can't love others just because they're gay, or even not as christian-ly as others. I felt the same as her. I've struggled with not knowing, and people just giving Bible verses instead of answers. It made me think. I am not a person strong in my faith. I haven't found a personal connection, my own faith. But I do believe in loving people. Which is actually what christians are called to do/be. We are supposed to be love. And to show love to every one. Not just the nicely dressed white people who always look good, and never seem to have ever doubted their faith, or the black church choir who sends shivers down your back with how good they are at praisin'. Not just our pastors. Not just the people who watch the little kids during the services. Everyone.

How can anyone call themselves Christians, when they're too busy hating on the people they deem as "non-christians". I think it even goes further than christians versus non-christians. I think there are the christians, who see themselves as being at the top. The top of what, I don't know, but it can come of as hoity-toity. Then there are the wishy-washy christians, who fake it well. But they don't always keep it up all the time, and they aren't too worried about it. (I'm prolly in this catagory) Then there are the not christians, but the ones the keep quiet about it all. There are the anti-christians, the people who are so against christians and the church that they want nothing to do with it. Not only do they want nothing to do with it, the bad mouth it all they can. And then, we have the people who "live in sin". Can't "be changed". They're the gay people, the people who are skanks and they like it. The people on drugs, the alcoholics. The ones who are un-apologetically living their lives as they see fit.

And then somewhere there are the legit christians, who actually try to love everyone. They don't always succeed, but they try. They are like Darren Criss, though not all can sing.

I started this a couple days ago, then had to go to class, so I forget where exactly I was going with this. But if you're a christian, please don't be the christian who drives people away by being holier than thou. Be the one who loves the druggies, and the skanks, and those who are gay. Don't immediately write them off. Everyone has value. Everyone needs love. Everyone craves love. And we may not be able to change their minds, their religion, their hearts or their minds. But maybe, just maybe, we'll be the people who make christianity seem appealing. And then someday down the road, they will change their minds/ hearts. And we will have had a part in that. But how can we do anything like that if we're too busy hating and judging?

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Not Alone

So, Glee came on again last night. So good. So much Darren. And my friend Danielle was practically in tears during all the Darren Criss- y goodness. (Like when he was in the shower. Which was my favorite part as well)

But then she wrote a blog about why she loves Darren Criss, and Team Starkid. And it was beautiful. And it made me want to write a blog about why I love Darren and Starkid so much.

Growing up, I didn't have an abundance of friends, or really close friends. My sister is 5 and half years older than me, so she pretty much stopped playing with me about when I was 7. I was homeschooled and lived about an hour away from most the people I know. Off a highway, so I don't even really have neighbors. Don't get me wrong, I went out and did stuff with people. I wasn't a total recluse. But I never had a chance to get to be bosom buddies with anyone. I always pictured myself as Anne Shirley, but I had no Dianna to run and play with. And so, my bestest closest friends that I cherished the most, (and still dearly loved), were books. Through middle school and high school, the highlight of my week was always going to the library to get an assload of books. New friends, old friends. Some I left as acquaintances, which I never fell in love with, but I still recognize them on the shelves. Others I fell deeply and ardently in love with, and I read and re-read them like crazy.

Somewhere in highschool, between my Junior and Senior year, I discovered A Very Potter Musical. And I loved it. Also, about when I started, they had just put out A Very Potter Sequel. And I just watched it and loved it. I went on to watch Me and My Dick, and then when Starship came out I watched, got the album, would've gotten the shirts, but I had no money for it. On Friday, yes this Friday, April the 13th, Starkid's next musical comes out. And you can bet your ass I will be watching it. Possibly much more than once.

You see, the magical thing about Starkid, more than them being college students who wrote and put on these amazing musicals, more than them becoming super popular and still incredibly nice, The thing is..... They made me feel like I wasn't alone. Whether it was Harry Freaking Potter finally finding a home at Hogwarts, or a dick finding true love, or Bug becoming a Starship Ranger, they were all there for me. Through their musicals, and their cuteness, and their nerdiness. They are just lovely human beings.

They gave me hope for college. That I would find friends there, and we would go on to do great things, and be supermegaawesomefoxyhot friends. As someone who is really shy/awkward around people she doesn't know, I was super nervous about going to college, if I would become friends with anyone, if people would like me. Actually, I talked with people the very first week about Team Starkid. And we're still good friends. Actually the people I talked to are now some of my best friends on campus.

Starkid told me I'm not alone. That I need to kick it up a notch, that there's no way we're giving up, that I don't know me, the way they do. And when it's time, in less than a month, to say goodbye to all these wonderful people I've come to love for summer break, Days of Summer will be constantly playing. Along with Gotta Get Back to Hogwarts.

And I would just like to say, bless Joe Walker's abs. Just.... just bless them....

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Easter Break coming up!! Woo hoo!

So, I'm ready for a break. Even though I just had one 2 weeks ago. I'm ready for sleeping before the sleepless nights before finals. I'm ready to read, maybe draw a bit.

I.... keep hearing about relationships. Everywhere. Just everywhere. And.... relationships in relation to me. And it's just from everywhere! Like my spam mail. The chapels at my college. The surveys we took in sociology... How does it just keep popping up?

I feel fine being single. I mean, I don't feel the need to go out and git muh-self a man. They seem like such a hassle. Honestly.

Though I do have a little checklist in my head of what a boyfriend would be good for. But I don't need one. Nope. I, as my friend Danielle says, am a strong independent black woman who don't need no man. And I love her for it. I feel perfectly fine being single. I don't feel lonely (except when PMSing, but I'm just emotional in general then.) I don't feel like I need someone to complete me.

So why does it keep coming up? I feel like I'm being peer-pressured. Only I sincerely doubt my proffesors and the higher ups who run the school and decide chapels got together with my spam mail to make me feel like I need to get in a relationship.